Ama and Dreams

Two and a half years ago my grandfather, Ama, died in his Amadeo home. I wasn't there when he went. I was busy with my internship stint at UP-PGH. But I cut my shift as soon as I learnt of this. He died of lung cancer. I remember how death didn't really sink in until I saw his coffin being carried to the house.

Since the start of my exposure to clinical practice in PGH, I knew I wanted to be involved in curing people with cancer. I don't know what lies ahead for sure, but I am ardently praying that the dreams that have been put in my heart will come into realization. I just got the results, and I know it's just the tip of the iceberg. I might be "one" after all, I'm hoping for the best.

Of Prism

Can I just say. I love Katy Perry's album Prism. I put these on repeat, particularly:

1. Roar – kinda can relate to this. I won't expound but I felt this way at one point.
   
2. Unconditionally – makes one feel optimistic and excited about falling in love
   
3. International Smile – I don't quite get the message of this, but kinda makes me feel empowered as a woman (go figure)
   
4. Ghost – I don't really put this one on repeat* but it really makes sense, really happens in real life
   
5. Love Me – makes you remember how KP is also just a person, and she feels insecurities like the rest of us
   
6. Double Rainbow – similar to unconditionally, it makes one feel optimistic about the big bright future
   
7. By the Grace of God – she goes back to her roots, basically He is where we get our courage – no matter how deplorable the situation might seem
   
8. It Takes Two – I like the beat on this one. Haha. Reminds me of my bassist days. Oh and if you think the song is about two people in love, you're wrong. The song is actually about a break-up. Yes. There are two sides to every story.
   

One more thing I am thinking about right now is how I love KP's lips on the Unconditionally video. Chanel Velvet Allure, I bet.

miss world

I watched the coronation night of Ms. World 2013 last night. And can I just say, the judges chose well. I'm not saying that just because I'm a Filipina. I used to just ignore Megan Young before but the way she carried herself last night was surreal. She moved graciously like she had already won the crown even before she did.  
*****

And out of the blue, I got love advice from Tyra Banks.

back to basics

Hello. Seeing a colleague apply Mineral Make-Up (MMU) made me wonder why I stopped using MMU. After all, I was on these stuff starting mid-2010, when my friend Niña introduced them to me. I became addicted. But I didn't have the budget to buy a lot then since I was still in school. I just settled with the basic foundie and finishing powder. I never tried anything but Ellana.

And then I remember why I stopped using MMU - I got all the freebies from Benefit (ironically, also because of Niña!) as a result of a semi-internship sometime November 2011. So then I used the freebies. And when the freebies ran out, the concept of MMU was already buried deep in my make-up junkie subconscious.

I remember two years ago, when I was walking alone in this mall in Sydney (I think it was Westfield). A beauty consultant walked up to me and offered some MMU. I was coincidentally using MMU then, and I vividly remember her telling me, "That's why you have great skin!". Back then I knew she was telling the truth. I had just taken the boards and was stress-free, in vacation. She asked how much my brand was back in the Philippines then I told her it was about equivalent to 10 AUD. Imagine her shock because the stuff she was offering me was around 65 AUD! Suffice to say, I didn't buy anything from that stall.

And then now it sank in, Korean make-up is not doing anything good for my skin. I do know my break-out pattern. One week before the period, when my progestin levels are on the roof. And when I'm not getting enough sleep, of course. I just had to ditch my present selection.

Then I have this light-bulb moment, my experience tells me MMU does not break me out even during my period! I started researching, I ordered samples (who knows, I might require a different shade this time). Good thing Ellana sends samples (you just have to pay for the postal fee).

After two days of using these, a friend noticed the difference already. See I had really dull tones.

A week later, I end up buying these: (fresh from the mailman, received today!)

 

my mini-haul

...and because I miss the Hidden Mickey segment in Disney Channel
(but this one's not really hidden, is it?)

Innocence concealer, Hazelnut Latte Foundation, Smile color corrector

 

lusting over white chocolate (and corny ko, hehe)

No, really: Lust Blush, Sheer Velvet Primer High-Definition in White Chocolate

 

 Neater-than-before packaging, this will be so much easier to use!

lip and cheek tint in Ruby..need this because I'm busy(lazy) I do not do retouches

 

cake on our dinner table

Will post an update regarding the skin situation in a few weeks' time. Goodnight! *wink*

i wonder

I remember this beautiful old lady. I wonder how she is right now. I've been thinking about her lately, I don't know why. Maybe it's the rains. I sometimes worry the waters will rise up to her house again. And she'll be alone. Or not (I can't really tell now). I'd love to sit down and chat with her, just to see how she's doing.

About a year and a half ago I stopped frequenting her place because of a very embarrassing incident involving a window and a hallway. I still went there - about three times the following year. But I missed her at those times - I actually still do up to now. :(

I adored her even when sometimes I did not like what she said. She has an endearing personality, I knew this the first time I saw her. I saw wisdom in her eyes, wit in her smile and intellect in her voice. I loved the way she fed her children and grandchildren. And when one of them got heartbroken, her simple, "It's alright" made even me, a dinner guest, calm and secured.

She loves in a weird way, at least this is what I have felt in those storytelling one-on-ones we had. I always imagined her stories like they were happening in a black and white screen behind her head.

Maybe in that way I'll be like her when I grow old. I hope so.

belated thank you

I have been meaning, since the first week of January, to write a gratitude post in this blog. I am happy to say that I received everything I wanted last Christmas. I guess if you're specific you're really gonna receive what you want.







(By the way these photos were taken last December, hence the brand new aura.

I'm very thankful for having received these, I was then and I still am now, even when this post is some five months late.

More happy posts to come.:)

recurring theme

This has been recurring in my FB news feed lately. Maybe this is a sign. Suffice to say, I've always known where I went wrong. Everything happens for a reason, even when we do not understand.

I still have faith in you.

Right from the start You were a thief You stole my heart And I your willing victim I let you see the parts of me That weren't all that pretty And with every touch you fixed them

Now you've been talking in your sleep oh oh Things you never say to me oh oh Tell me that you've had enough Of our love, our love

Just give me a reason Just a little bit's enough Just a second we're not broken just bent And we can learn to love again

It's in the stars It's been written in the scars on our hearts That we're not broken just bent And we can learn to love again

I'm sorry I don't understand Where all of this is coming from I thought that we were fine (Oh we had everything) Your head is running wild again My dear we still have everythin' And it's all in your mind (Yeah but this is happenin')

You've been havin' real bad dreams oh oh You used to lie so close to me oh oh There's nothing more than empty sheets Between our love, our love Oh our love, our love

Just give me a reason Just a little bit's enough Just a second we're not broken just bent And we can learn to love again

I never stopped You're still written in the scars on my heart You're not broken just bent And we can learn to love again

Oh tear ducts and rust I'll fix it for us We're collecting dust But our love's enough

You're holding it in You're pouring a drink No nothing is as bad as it seems We'll come clean

Just give me a reason Just a little bit's enough Just a second we're not broken just bent And we can learn to love again

It's in the stars It's been written in the scars on our hearts That we're not broken just bent And we can learn to love again

Just give me a reason Just a little bit's enough Just a second we're not broken just bent And we can learn to love again

It's in the stars It's been written in the scars on our hearts That we're not broken just bent And we can learn to love again Oh we can learn to love again Oh we can learn to love again oh oh That we're not broken just bent And we can learn to love again